{"id":1431,"date":"2020-05-29T10:34:22","date_gmt":"2020-05-29T10:34:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/?p=1431"},"modified":"2020-06-22T11:16:03","modified_gmt":"2020-06-22T11:16:03","slug":"detrimental-misconceptions-about-depression","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/detrimental-misconceptions-about-depression\/","title":{"rendered":"Detrimental Misconceptions About Depression"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span>\u200bThe journey to find a good therapist<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><strong>Searching for a therapist<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Whether you\u2019re dealing with depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, or feel like you may just need to talk about what is happening in your life with someone outside your social circle, therapy can be an incredibly helpful tool in finding our way through life. For some people it\u2019s hard to come to a place where they are ready to see a therapist.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">But it can be even harder to find the right therapist that will actually help you with the problems you are facing.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">It took me a long time to finally find a person that works for me in my unique situation. And the process of getting there has been frustrating and confusing at times. The first step for most of us these days is to hop online and start searching for our options. And looking at all the different letters after a therapist\u2019s name is where some of the confusion may already start.<\/p>\n<h3>Your therapist might be multiple people<\/h3>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">For me, my therapist ended up being several different people. During my depression, I had access to a mental health counselor. Working with him was the very first step I took toward counselling and therapy. After several years, I had to relocate for school. Needless to say, I had to find a different therapist in the new city.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">\u201cOur wounds are often the openings into the best and most beautiful parts of us.\u201d&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;&#8211; David Richo<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">And as I moved along my journey through depression, many others joined my mental health team. For instance, I worked with a psychiatrist and a hypnotherapist for some time. After that, my needs changed and I worked with a relationship counselor and later on a women-focused life coach. You may find that over time, your needs will change as well.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span>Psychiatrist, psychologist, counselor or therapist?<\/span><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Broadly speaking, different designations (their title represented by letters after their name) refer to different paths and lengths of education that person has taken to come to practice. They may also be registered with different regulatory bodies depending on which designation they have. I have a quick outline for you here. But keep in mind that there may be differences depending on the country of practice or even the state or province you live in.<\/p>\n<h3>Psychiatrist<\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"\">A medical doctor who specializes in diagnosing and treating mental illness<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"\">*Licensed to write prescriptions*<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"\">Equipped to deal with extreme presentations of mental illness<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>May focus solely on medication management and a medical diagnosis and work in tandem with another therapist for behavioral therapy (some psychiatrists will also do behavioral therapy themselves)<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>Determines appropriate treatments based on clinical diagnoses and observations<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>May have a more academic approach<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>Psychologist<\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"\">Has a doctoral degree in psychology<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"\">Most psychologists cannot (in most states of the USA, for example) prescribe medication, so they may work with your medical doctor if prescriptions or medical procedures are necessary<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"\">Focus is on behavioral therapy<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>Helps clients clarify their feelings and make life decisions<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>Aims to support and guide you<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3 style=\"\">Licensed Counselor<\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"\">Usually has a Master&#8217;s Degree in Psychology, counseling, or a related field<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"\">Cannot prescribe medications<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"\">Focus is on talking and behavioral therapy<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>Helps clients clarify their feelings and make life decisions<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>Aims to support and guide you<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>Clinical social worker<\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"\">Has at least a Master&#8217;s Degree in Social Work and additional training to be able to evaluate and treat mental illnesses.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"\">Most can help with case management (like hospital discharge planning), in addition to referring to community resources and advocate for patients in the system<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"\">Helps clients clarify their feelings and make life decisions<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>Aims to support and guide you<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>Therapist<\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"\">A broad term in the mental health field that usually refers to someone who specializes in behavioral therapy, like a psychologist, psychiatrist, marriage counselor, social worker, or even alternative helping practitioners and life coaches<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"\">Helps clients clarify their feelings and make life decisions<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"\">Aims to support and guide you<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span>Navigating the internet for a therapist<\/span><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">With the above guidelines in mind, have a look at online registries and search results and start browsing your options. Reading through their websites thoroughly can often give you a pretty good idea of the type of therapy they provide. A lot of times you can find a rating for a doctor or therapist and read through the reviews online. Moreover, there are many mental health forums you can join that help you find a therapist in your area.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">You may also want to find the answers to some basic questions for each therapist. Is their approach more academic or emotional? What type of methods do they specialize in? Do they work with specific demographics? How long have they been a therapist? What are their qualifications and are they licensed to practice where you live?<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Finding a therapist online\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" title=\"Finding a therapist online\" data-id=\"1243\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Finding-a-therapist-online.jpg\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"426\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"426\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 640px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 640\/426;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s a good idea to narrow down the field with practical things like driving distance, hours of operation or offering online appointments.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">If you end up finding a helpful therapist, you could be going to see them for months or even years. A long commute or restricted working hours may end up becoming a burden when sessions have to fit between work and life. In addition, you might prefer to have sessions online, if driving is not feasible. In that case, be sure to check if they offer online appointments.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span>Will the cost of a therapist be covered?<\/span><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">In case you are lucky enough to have extended medical coverage, you may also want to check with your insurance provider if they cover the specific designation of therapist you are considering. The letters at the end of the name can be a minefield of confusion. Even one letter different than the approved designation can mean that you end up paying out of pocket.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">I found it easiest to actually have their title in front of me when I called my insurance provider to double check if it was included in my coverage. If you don\u2019t have medical coverage, there are still many resources online. Moreover, certain programs you may qualify for that subsidize therapy or provide free counselling. Check with your doctor, community mental health resources, or online for more information specific to your area.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Therapist costs\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" title=\"Therapist costs\" data-id=\"1244\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Therapist-costs.jpg\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"426\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"426\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 640px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 640\/426;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">During my teenage years, I received free counselling through our local mental health program. Later, my therapy was covered through my studies at university. Once I finished studying, I did not have a job with medical coverage. I ended up in another community mental health program. This worked very well for me because I was still in a large city. It might be a little more difficult to get access to support in smaller towns or rural areas.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">As my needs changed and I considered alternative therapies, some sessions were covered by my extended medical and some were not. I have to say that private medical insurance is getting much better at covering therapy; however, they still have a long way to go. You may find that if you choose an alternative practitioner, like a hypnotherapist, you may have to pay out of pocket.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span>Ask friends and family or check online reviews<\/span><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Different people respond to different therapists and everyone has different goals for their own therapy. In other words, what might work for one person, may not work for another. So with that in mind, it\u2019s still worth asking for recommendations from friends or family. It can be very helpful if they are seeing their therapist for similar reasons or goals to your own. If you\u2019re comfortable, ask around to your family or friends to see if anyone has had an experience worth recommending.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Therapist reviews\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" title=\"Therapist reviews\" data-id=\"1245\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Therapist-reviews.jpg\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"426\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"426\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 640px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 640\/426;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">If that\u2019s not an option for you, it can always be worthwhile to read the online reviews for some therapists you are considering. Again, keep in mind that a therapist is a very individual fit, but sometimes the review can apply more broadly. Take the online reviews with a grain of salt. I have seen so many bad reviews that actually had nothing to do at all with the quality of therapy. Above all, don\u2019t be turned off solely by the online reviews.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">You may be seeing a doctor already for your depression and you can always ask her or him for a recommendation. Often, doctors know the available therapists in the area and can even make a quick call for a referral. Keep in mind that you are not obliged to stick with that therapist. But, it might get you a quick appointment, if you need help now. My doctor set up my referral to the community mental health program and I received the help I needed right away.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: normal;\">Have a consultation call<\/span><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Once you\u2019ve narrowed the field of potential therapists, try to request a short consultation phone call or ask questions in an email. Share a bit about your background and your goals and see if this fits into their area of expertise. After that, you can also ask any questions the website did not answer for you. Especially any questions around fees or age group.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Consultation call\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" title=\"Consultation call\" data-id=\"1246\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Consultation-call.jpg\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"426\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"426\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 640px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 640\/426;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Some people ask the therapist about where they went to school or the experience they have with their type of issue. Have they ever helped someone overcome it successfully? Their answer should make you feel confident that they can help you achieve your goals. So, go with your gut feeling when it comes to making the final decision.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: normal;\">The first session<\/span><\/h2>\n<p>Especially if it\u2019s your first time to counselling, it can be an awkward experience to just sit down and start talking about your intimate feelings with a complete stranger. A good therapist will, however, always make you feel welcome and comfortable. They will be a very attentive listener, while building a conversation as organically as possible. You should never feel like they are distracted, or pushing their own agenda or opinion on what you\u2019ve shared. You should feel like they are only working to support your goals for therapy.<\/p>\n<p>Look for any red flags, including:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>                    <span style=\"\">Your therapist is talking more than you<\/span><\/li>\n<li>                    <span style=\"\">The therapist is interrupting you a lot<\/span><\/li>\n<li>                    <span style=\"\">Your therapist is making you feel judged or ashamed<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>Physical contact without express consent that makes you uncomfortable<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>Inappropriate behavior or questions that make you uncomfortable in a way that feels unrelated to the goals of the therapy<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>Violating confidentiality about you or another patient (like sharing details with you about another patient while actually sharing that individual\u2019s identity)<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"First session with a therapist\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" title=\"First session with a therapist\" data-id=\"1251\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/First-session-with-a-therapist.jpg\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"427\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"427\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 640px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 640\/427;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>If all goes well, and you feel comfortable, you and your therapist will agree on a treatment plan and schedule going forward; however, if the session did not make you feel comfortable for any reason, you have no obligation to schedule another appointment. You can simply continue looking for another therapist. Never feel pressured to have to stay with one therapist. Therapy is deeply personal and you need to feel like you can work with a particular therapist.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: normal;\">How long should I see a therapist<\/span><\/h2>\n<p>This answer very much depends on the issue you are dealing with and the type of treatment you are receiving. Everyone is different. Some people go to therapy for only a few months to overcome a particularly hard time in their lives. Others will need the support for life. Talk to your therapist about their recommendations in order to set expectations and find the right fit for your life.<\/p>\n<p>I started off with counselling several times a week because of my situation. Over time, I went once a week. Later, I simply phoned when I needed an appointment. You may find that when you are in the midst of a severe depression, you will need a lot more support than when you are just feeling down. As you get to know yourself and your depression, you may also find that you get better at asking for help when you need it. Now, when I know I am sliding down a slippery slope, I get in touch with my therapist and get the support I need. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having a support network you can call on when things get tough.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: normal;\">Finding a good fit<\/span><\/h2>\n<p>While highly trained, therapists are people, and just like anyone else you meet, they will have a certain style through which they communicate. Depending on where you\u2019re at with your journey and why you\u2019re seeking counselling, you may or may not feel comfortable with the way they communicate with you and approach what you\u2019re sharing with them.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Trust and rapport with therapist\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" title=\"Trust and rapport with therapist\" data-id=\"1252\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Trust-and-rapport-with-therapist.jpg\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"427\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"427\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 640px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 640\/427;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>Some have a very \u201cno-nonsense\u201d approach that can cut through messy feelings, while others may take a very soothing or comforting tone to encourage elaboration instead. It\u2019s important to go with your gut when deciding whether a certain therapist\u2019s style is right for you; however, it\u2019s most important to have a good rapport and feel very comfortable sharing with them.<\/p>\n<p>If after several sessions of getting to know them, you find yourself not wanting to share the whole story, or lying about anything, you\u2019ve most likely not found a good fit yet. The tendency to hold back or distort the truth means you are still feeling some kind of judgement from that person, and likely won\u2019t be able to share truthfully enough to make progress. Telling the whole truth in therapy is vital. In other words, if I\u2019m lying to my therapist, I\u2019m paying a lot of money to have someone work on a false problem. And that doesn\u2019t help!<\/p>\n<p>It may take a few sessions to know if you want to continue seeing a certain therapist, but don\u2019t feel bad if you have to try a few different ones before you find the right fit. While it can feel overwhelming to have to open up to different people in order to find a therapist you really find helpful, the reward of having someone who truly understands and guides you can be life changing (well worth the work).<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: normal;\">My own journey with therapists over the years<\/span><\/h2>\n<p>I once saw a psychologist for a few sessions who showed that she empathized with me like a trained parrot who said \u201cawww yes, that must have been hard for you\u201d after literally every sentence I said. At first I thought it was a nice way of sympathizing, but after an hour I had to restrain myself from yelling \u201cyes of course it was\u2026 that\u2019s why I\u2019m here, thank you for dwelling on that!!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I also saw a very stuffy counselor who was quite matter-of-fact. And at the end of the session I felt a bit judged and ashamed, almost like she was telling me to \u201csuck-it\u2019up\u201d about what I was feeling. In conclusion, I found that to be a very discouraging session and it took me a long time to even try with another counselor again.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Bad experience\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" title=\"Bad experience\" data-id=\"1253\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Bad-experience.jpg\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"427\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"427\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 640px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 640\/427;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>I have also seen other therapists who just wallowed in my pain with me out of immense empathy but never got me anywhere productive in my thoughts. Above all, while sympathy and empathy are important, you also want to find a way to resolve your problem, not just keep drawing it out.<\/p>\n<p>In the end, through a friend\u2019s inadvertent recommendation I found a woman who has just the right amount of humor, sympathy and \u201clet\u2019s do it\u201d attitude to make me feel like I am talking with a friend. I feel accepted, so I can be completely honest with her, and to me, that is the most important part.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 300px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 300\/300;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: normal;\">The Takeaway<\/span><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">No matter how many degrees a therapist has, if you feel scared, intimidated, or judged, you won\u2019t tell them the full truth. And they will never really be able to help you with your inner conflict. You have to find someone you can be open with, someone you trust fully; however,&nbsp; the biggest mistake I made was giving up after meeting with a counselor who was simply not a good fit for me. I mistakenly thought all therapy would be the same.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">What I learned over time is that it might take a bit of searching and trying before finding someone who clicks with you. In addition, you might want to widen your search area to therapists who work with different methods. Some people respond better to one therapy method and others need a different way to work through their situation. I feel like therapy is as individual as buying your clothes. In other words, what fits for you might be terrible for someone else.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">And you can hopefully count on the fact that you will change. Your therapist will likely make the very best effort to support you as much as they can. For instance, you may reach a point where you have resolved one issue and are needing to resolve something else. Sometimes, as you grow as a person, you may outgrow your therapist and need to work with someone else.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"New therapist\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" title=\"New therapist\" data-id=\"1249\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/New-therapist.jpg\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"426\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"426\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 640px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 640\/426;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<h3>Don\u2019t be afraid of therapy<\/h3>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Therapy is there to help you. You may not want to hear the truth about certain things you discuss in therapy, but even that is crucial if you want to move forward. I found that while it was comforting to talk to my family or friends, I needed someone completely unrelated to help me. None of my family is trained in therapy. But, they also tend to coddle me and that did not help with my recovery in the long term.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Often, after severe trauma, it is difficult to get started with therapy.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Don\u2019t let that fear of opening up and having to \u201crelive\u201d your trauma stop you from seeking help. Therapists are trained to work with traumatized people and they will support you through whatever you are experiencing. I found that working with my trauma actually allowed me to heal through it. I feel like if I had not worked with a therapist, my trauma would still be haunting me at every turn because I would have just tried to ignore it and shut it out.<\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"No fear of therapy\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" title=\"No fear of therapy\" data-id=\"1248\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/No-fear-of-therapy.jpg\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"426\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"426\" src=\"data:image\/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB3aWR0aD0iMSIgaGVpZ2h0PSIxIiB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciPjwvc3ZnPg==\" class=\"lazyload\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 640px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 640\/426;\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">One final thought I want to put out there is that you need to be open. If you go to therapy with the mindset that you have no problems and you will just prove them wrong, therapy will be a waste of your time. You can only be helped if you are open to receiving help and open to changing. You are in your current situation because you have followed one path. It seems obvious that if you are not prepared to change that path, you will continue down the same road with the same results.<\/p>\n<p>Make a conscious decision to choose yourself today. You deserve to be happy and find the healing and support you need.<\/p>\n<p>Sources<\/p>\n<p><span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.webmd.com\/mental-health\/guide-to-psychiatry-and-counseling#1\" style=\"outline: none;\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">https:\/\/www.webmd.com\/mental-health\/guide-to-psychiatry-and-counseling#1<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"text-decoration: none; display: inline-block;\">https:\/\/www.allpsychologyschools.com\/psychology\/differences-therapist-psychologist\/<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.thejorni.com\" style=\"outline: none;\">www.thejorni.com<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u200bThe journey to find a good therapist Searching for a therapist Whether you\u2019re dealing with depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, or feel like you may just need to talk about what is happening in your life with someone outside your social circle, therapy can be an incredibly helpful tool in finding our way through life. [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1452,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","tve_updated_post":"<div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e259e15\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e342696\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4620c5\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-columns\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e453273\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-row tcb--cols--2 tcb-resized\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e452da4\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4457d4\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4560fb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5dd307\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img class=\"tve_image wp-image-158\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4414d6\"><\/span><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4457f1\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5e3e36\"><h2 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5d96c3\"><span data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5df7b5\">\u200bDepression misconceptions are widespread<br><\/span><\/h2><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0249\"><strong>Breaking the stigma around misconceptions<\/strong><\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">When you are living with depression and\/or anxiety, everyday tasks can be a struggle. There were many weeks I did not shower or do laundry. And days I could not get out of bed. It can be quite a task just to perform the basic functions and sometimes we have a huge internal dialogue as we are doing them.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2538ab\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2945a3\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2787cf\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e285f42\" style=\"text-align: center;\">\u201cEvery day begins with an act of courage and hope: getting our of bed.\u201d<br>&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;- Mason Cooley<\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">We have a little critical companion that is constantly telling us that we \u201cshould be doing better\u201d or we might be \u201cfailing\u201d at something badly. Our inner voice can be a harsh critic and an unhelpful over-worrier. On top of this, we may also be dealing with the comments others make about us.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-160c1e84e06\" data-ct-name=\"Modern 9\" data-ct=\"stylebox-8929\" data-element-name=\"Styled Box\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e825c68\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb tve_empty_dropzone\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e825c69\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4e4a7f\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sometimes we are lucky to find understanding or support about our mental health condition.<\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">But other times, we end up hearing detrimental comments that work to further fuel our own inner fears about our condition. Most of these comments are born out of misconceptions about depression and can, therefore, be quite damaging in perpetuating the stigmas surrounding mental illness.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Here are some of the things you could hear people say about someone who is depressed.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727feca00f\">The comment<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">\u201cShe is super-high functioning, so I don\u2019t think she is depressed\u201d<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727feca00f\">The misconceptions<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">All people suffering from depression are home-bound and unable to perform tasks in their daily lives.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727feca00f\">The truth<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Many individuals with depression rattle on at high speeds like a runaway locomotive. And on the outside it can seem like they are doing fine. The reality is that some people do not have the option of stepping away from certain responsibilities. Instead, they end up with coping mechanisms that let them function externally, while carrying the damage inside.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Often, for these individuals, the breakdown can come if they are forced to take a break and actually deal with their feelings. High-functioning individuals with depression may sometimes continue to uphold the facade of being okay because they feel they don\u2019t have a safe place to be themselves or deal with their problems.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-171f0a7b071\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img class=\"tve_image wp-image-1443\" alt=\"Misconceptions and professional women\" width=\"640\" height=\"457\" title=\"Misconceptions and professional women\" data-id=\"1443\" src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Misconceptions-and-professional-women.jpg\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8eb50c15\" style=\"\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"457\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"457\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">They may even find small windows of \u201callowed non-composure\u201d where they have crying or screaming outbursts in the shower or car. And then appear perfectly put together again at work 20 minutes later. Being able to perform your responsibilities may only signal a different stage or expression of depression, but the underlying illness can definitely still be present.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727feca00f\">The comments<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">\u201cI don\u2019t believe that you\u2019re actually depressed\u201d<br>\u201cJust snap out of it\u201d<br>\u201cYou\u2019re not even trying to be happy\u201d<br>\u201cYou\u2019re not grateful for what you actually have\u201d<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727feca00f\">The misconceptions<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Depression is an emotion that can be turned on and off at will<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727feca00f\">The truth<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sometimes, people can be quite supportive of a condition if you ask them to help out because you\u2019re not able to fulfill certain duties. Yet if that condition persists a bit longer than they initially expected, those feelings of sympathy and understanding can sometimes turn to resentment and blame.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">This is not just true for mental illness, but many illnesses or conditions where a person is unable to care for themselves, like cancer or even a broken leg. The difference between a broken leg and depression is that you cannot \u201csee\u201d depression. And because there are so many misconceptions about it, people tend to treat it like something you can just \u201cstop\u201d when you\u2019re done being \u201cdramatic\u201d. The problem here is that people have confused \u201cdepression\u201d - the mental illness, with \u201cI\u2019m sad today\u201d - the emotion.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Depression is a mental illness, not just an emotion.<br><br>It\u2019s not something we \u201cchoose\u201d to do or feel. We cannot just put on a fun song and \u201cchange our minds\u201d about it. And this difference in approach affects how a person with this condition is treated.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Western medicine has often approached the mind as a \u201cless concrete, less important\u201d entity as the physical body. That perpetuates the concept that conditions of the mind are somehow \u201cless real\u201d or \u201cless important\u201d than conditions of the physical body. This is the framework that must be challenged in order to give mental illness the respect and understanding it deserves.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727feca00f\">The comment<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">\u201cYou\u2019re not depressed, you\u2019re lazy\u201d<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727feca00f\">The misconceptions<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Depression only affects your mind<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727feca00f\">The truth<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">The more research is done, the more links are found between depression and a huge variety of physical symptoms. Depression can cause symptoms as debilitating as full-body nerve pain, chronic migraines and persistent diarrhea and continuous fatigue. It is understandable that any individual experiencing these symptoms could be fully disabled by this condition.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-171f0a7b071\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img class=\"tve_image wp-image-1444\" alt=\"Constant fatigue\" width=\"640\" height=\"409\" title=\"Constant fatigue\" data-id=\"1444\" src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Constant-fatigue.jpg\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8eb50c15\" style=\"\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"409\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"409\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">But because mental illness is often still misunderstood, people who struggle with their mental health are often blamed for how they feel. This stems out of some mistrust that their feelings are only arbitrary and not part of a medically recognized illness. Depression can be a full-body illness, and it can change, evolve, get better, and get worse at different times for different people.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">While depression is more individual and complex than a broken limb, a person suffering from it is no more responsible for their disability than someone who has a broken foot. Their disability should be treated according to this sentiment. You wouldn\u2019t blame someone with a broken foot for not being able to care for their child in the same way. And neither should you expect that from someone with a mental illness.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e342696\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4620c5\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-columns\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e453273\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-row tcb--cols--2 tcb-resized\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e452da4\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4457d4\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4560fb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5dd307\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img class=\"tve_image wp-image-158\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4414d6\"><\/span><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4457f1\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5e3e36\"><h2 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5d96c3\"><span data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5df7b5\">\u200bThe toll of these misconceptions<br><\/span><\/h2><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">There are many misconceptions about depression, and their sentiment fuels the stigma that can still surround mental illness. Unfortunately, this stigma continues to put up additional hurdles for people who suffer from mental illness and keeps them from getting help, and getting better. It does this by...<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727feca00f\">... adding shame<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Because some people still blame the individual with the illness for how they feel. They cause that person a lot of shame when they are not able to change the way they feel on demand. This shame is further internalized and only causes more damage and pain.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727fed3615\">... adding guilt<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Again, because a person with depression is often blamed for not being able to function or perform their responsibilities, there is a huge burden of guilt that can also build up around not being able to participate or meet expectations.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727fedad90\">...keeping the conversation about just \u201cchanging our minds\u201d instead of healing a mental illness<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">When the focus is constantly kept on just \u201cfixing\u201d what is wrong with the person, rather than how their illness can be healed, we only continue blame and never get to the constructive conversations that get to the root of mental illness.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1727fee0478\">...making us feel we can\u2019t be honest about our condition, at home, at work or at school<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Often, the stigma associated with admitting you\u2019re struggling with mental illness is a burden that is too overwhelming or consequential to face. People may worry about how they will be perceived at work or by friends, and are afraid of being seen as \u201cweak\u201d or \u201ccrazy\u201d. People may choose instead to put up a facade and manage as best they can without someone \u201cdiscovering\u201d their true state. This can be where the illusion of a highly-functioning depressed person is born from, and it can lead to even more significant breakdown if that person doesn\u2019t find help.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-171f0a7b071\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img class=\"tve_image wp-image-1445\" alt=\"Misconceptions taking a toll\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" title=\"Misconceptions taking a toll\" data-id=\"1445\" src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Misconceptions-taking-a-toll.jpg\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8eb50c15\" style=\"\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"426\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"426\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Mental illness misconceptions create additional burdens and hurdles for people suffering from mental illness. And unfortunately they all culminate to one big result. They cause people with depression to be more likely to blame themselves (which contributes to the likelihood of suicide), and less likely to be honest about how they feel so they can reach out for support and professional help. Sadly, this is still a large reason why some people with mental illness are not finding the treatment they need or getting better.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e342696\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4620c5\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-columns\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e453273\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-row tcb--cols--2 tcb-resized\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e452da4\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4457d4\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4560fb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5dd307\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img class=\"tve_image wp-image-158\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4414d6\"><\/span><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4457f1\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5e3e36\"><h2 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5d96c3\"><span data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5df7b5\">What can help break misconceptions<\/span><\/h2><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2e5be0\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">There are still significant institutional and structural changes that need to take place in society to build a supportive system for mental health. Yet one place to start to change the misconceptions that hurt our progress is definitely education. Creating awareness is the first step to creating lasting change.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2e5be0\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">So if you\u2019re suffering from mental illness, break the cycle of shame and speak out. Remember, you wouldn\u2019t be apologetic if you broke your arm, so don\u2019t feel guilty about how your depression makes you feel. The more we talk openly about mental illness, the more it helps others understand what it is. The more we are honest, the more we can dispel the fears.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8eb50c10\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img class=\"tve_image wp-image-1446\" alt=\"Conversations around misconceptions\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" title=\"Conversations around misconceptions\" data-id=\"1446\" src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Conversations-around-misconceptions.jpg\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8eb50c15\" style=\"\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"426\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"426\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-160c1e84e06\" data-ct-name=\"Modern 9\" data-ct=\"stylebox-8929\" data-element-name=\"Styled Box\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e825c68\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb tve_empty_dropzone\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e825c69\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4e4a7f\">And if you know someone that you think might be struggling with depression, don\u2019t be afraid to try and reach out.<\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2ea231\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">It might even be easier than you think to support someone. Even something as easy as \u201chow\u2019s it going today - really?\u201d might be the opening someone is looking for to find support. <br><br>Take a cue from their body language to see if they are ready to share. Remember, you don\u2019t need to understand someone\u2019s depression in order to help them. You can just listen and be patient. And any time you\u2019re worried about someone\u2019s behavior, and you think they might need help beyond what you are able to give, find a crisis line near you for more advice and resources.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e342696\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4620c5\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-columns\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e453273\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-row tcb-resized tcb--cols--2\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e452da4\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4457d4\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4560fb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5dd307\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img class=\"tve_image wp-image-158\" alt=\"Round Arrow\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" title=\"Round Arrow\" data-id=\"158\" src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Round-Arrow-1.png\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4414d6\"><\/span><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e4457f1\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e5e3e36\"><h2 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e60884d\"><span style=\"font-weight: normal;\">The Takeaway<\/span><\/h2><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2fd23f\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">During my depression, I pretty much saw and experienced it all. Some people seemed to care about what was going on. But often they just did not understand or know how to help. Many others just shook it off and walked away from our friendship because dealing with a depressed person was too much. Especially when I struggled with depression over many years, people just seemed to lose interest. The misconceptions were crazy and widespread.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2fd23f\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">It has been my goal to open the conversation about mental health and keep it going. It\u2019s not an easy thing. But as you can see, those are necessary conversations we need to have. For one, we need to be able to get support to people who need it when they need it. And second, we need to break through a lot of the misconceptions about mental health.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2fd23f\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Everyone needs to decide for themselves if they want to speak up or not. But if you are struggling with a mental health condition I would encourage you to share. If we all keep silent, nothing will ever change. The system will stay the same and many people will simply fall through the cracks without getting the help they need.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e9bd23b\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img class=\"tve_image wp-image-1447\" alt=\"Getting help\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" title=\"Getting help\" data-id=\"1447\" src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Getting-help.jpg\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e9bd240\" style=\"\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"426\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"426\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2fd23f\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">I am a big believer in the fact that creating awareness is the first step to creating change. And yes, it\u2019s not always easy. I am sure people judge me in all kinds of ways for creating this blog and the J\u014drni. Maybe they do so out of ignorance or because of misinformation. But it is up to me to tell my story how it really is.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e93851dc4\">Your voice for change<\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2fd23f\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">You have the same power. If you are able to share, it may become part of your own healing journey. And you might change the lives of other people who connect with you. The mental health system in most countries is a long way from being perfect.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8eaa1067\" data-ct-name=\"Modern 9\" data-ct=\"stylebox-8929\" data-element-name=\"Styled Box\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8ea92876\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb tve_empty_dropzone\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8ea92877\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element tve_empty_dropzone\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8ea9287a\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8ea9287b\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">And often, community support online or in person is the biggest help we can find.<\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2fd23f\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">My own breakthrough with depression was born out of conversations with others who suffered from depression and anxiety. It was through this community that I started exploring many options and methods to try and deal with my depression. It can be a daunting journey if you feel like you are all alone in it. When you realize thousands of others are journeying with you, you may feel more supported and less alone.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8ea21c99\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img class=\"tve_image wp-image-1448\" alt=\"Use your voice for change\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" title=\"Use your voice for change\" data-id=\"1448\" src=\"https:\/\/thejorni.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/Use-your-voice-for-change.jpg\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e8ea21c9f\" style=\"\" data-width=\"640\" data-height=\"426\" data-init-width=\"640\" data-init-height=\"426\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2fd23f\" style=\"text-align: justify;\">Misconceptions exist everywhere and it\u2019s usually due to a lack of understanding and education. It is up to us, the people who are experiencing depression, to set the record straight. We have the power to support each other and the power to educate others. So, let\u2019s use this power wisely to create lasting change for better mental health support.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e31337a\">Your voice deserves to be heard!<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6ed46b\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-divider\" data-style-d=\"tve_sep-1\" data-thickness-d=\"1\" data-color-d=\"rgb(204, 204, 204)\" data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6ed464\">\n\t<hr class=\"tve_sep tve_sep-1\">\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6ed465\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6ed467\">Sources<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element tve-froala fr-box fr-basic\" data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6fabd5\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6ed468\"><span><a class=\"tve-froala fr-basic\" data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6ed46a\" href=\"https:\/\/www.time-to-change.org.uk\/category\/blog\/depression?page=7\" style=\"outline: none;\" target=\"_blank\">https:\/\/www.time-to-change.org.uk\/category\/blog\/depression?page=7<\/a><\/span><\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6fabd5\" style=\"\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6ed468\"><span style=\"text-decoration: none; display: inline-block;\">https:\/\/www.nami.org\/Blogs\/NAMI-Blog\/October-2018\/When-Stigma-Prevented-Me-from-Getting-Help<\/span><\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6fabd5\" style=\"\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16efc6ed468\"><span style=\"text-decoration: none; display: inline-block;\">https:\/\/www.nami.org\/Blogs\/NAMI-Blog\/March-2020\/Defeating-Stigma-with-Science<\/span><\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element tve-froala fr-box fr-basic\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e93746d6b\" style=\"\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-16e9374575e\" style=\"text-align: center;\"><a class=\"tve-froala fr-basic\" data-css=\"tve-u-16e93753a63\" href=\"https:\/\/www.thejorni.com\" style=\"outline: none;\">www.thejorni.com<\/a><\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>","tve_custom_css":"@import url(\"\/\/fonts.googleapis.com\/css?family=Montserrat:400,400i,500,500i,300,300i,600,700,900,800&subset=latin\");@import url(\"\/\/fonts.googleapis.com\/css?family=Quicksand:400,500&subset=latin\");@media (min-width: 300px){[data-css=\"tve-u-16e6f9579b5\"] { padding: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0249\"] { --g-regular-weight:400; font-size: 18px !important; font-family: Montserrat !important; font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight, normal)  !important; padding-bottom: 9px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e1d0ef9\"] { font-size: 16px !important; padding-bottom: 20px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-16e8e2538ab\"] { max-width: 60%; float: 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